please give me strength to...

avoid all temptations and allow me the self control I need to survive the day. After 3 cancer diagnosis it's very difficult to think positive and remain strong. There are more days when I feel like giving up and play dead under the blanket--ignoring everything around me. I will be 53 years old this month--I can't help but think that this may be my last birthday. What to do...

a love story...

that begins on a special/unexpected day/night feeling surprised/overwhelmed/warm/confused/amazed--what feelings were you feeling--was it love at first sight--was it something else that made it so special...when you close your eyes and think of love, whom do you see...

tests and more tests...

medical follow ups are always a nerve-racking experience--what will they find this time--will I be OK... Please God, let this exam be free of tumor and allow me more days on this earth--if that is your will then let it be done

Missing you...

at night as I retire....in the morning when I wake...when the rain falls...when I discover new things

I feel sad...

...each time we have to say goodbye. I can't wait for the day when we can always be together. I will once again have to spend my mornings without you...our coffee time...the talks and laughter we have... I will miss you...until we meet again

...not sure how...

to feel when a younger member of the family dies...especially when no one knows how it all happened. We all have no choice but the accept it and try to get over the loss and comfort their immediate family. I hope and pray that your death was not unpleasant and that your journey to the netherworld an easy and comfortable one. I pray to God that he accept you and may your resting place be beautiful without any pain or sufferings.

...exciting encounters...

are something that we think about as we get older. With 52 just around the corner, I find myself thinking more and more about my past and I shake my head in disbelief while smiling and feeling excited at the same time. I think to myself, "if I can only travel through my 20s and 30s once again, it would be so wonderful..." or would it? I really miss my young self with mini dresses, accessories, black pantyhose, etc... and fantastic drinks surrounded by beautiful people. Among my favorites as a young woman are:

1. Ice pink lipstick

 2. Silky White Nail Polish

Just how have I changed now that I'm 52 (two weeks from today)? I think I still like the same things but I have to be more conservative in the way I dress. For now (and probably always) I will continue to wear pink lipstick and white nail polish.